When we think about success, we often think about money or titles, but success doesn't have to be limited to your career. The truth is, success can come in every area of our lives, and without them we are simply wandering through life in those areas. A few examples could include our Education, Artistic abilities, Physical health, or our Relationships.
Many people I've found over the years simply drift through their lives. They seek entertainment and pleasure, and before they realize it they end up depressed, wondering what happened to the world around them.
The failure to plan, and the failure to understand what success means to you will limit you. This is not to say that entertainment should be removed from our lives, but that we should find balance so that we can develop a sense of satisfaction from what we've done in life through successes.
"If you don't know where you are going, you'll end up someplace else," (Yogi Berra).
One of the worst feelings I've had in life was when I came to the conclusion that I was wasting it. When I found myself drifting from job to job with no purpose, I discovered that I felt helpless and became depressed because I felt that my life lacked meaning.
Once I realized that I decided to take control of my life and developed a plan for success. This started with lots of reading, seminars, and mentors, and the more I catalog the events of my life I realize that the habits I've created have developed into a method for success that I call the B.I.A.S. for Success.
B: Build Your Goals List
There are many different ways to develop your goals. If you are focused on your career or tasks at work, you may want to employ the SMART Goal methodology. These are goals that are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time Bound.
However, as I mentioned earlier, not all goals are professional, so I've developed a different methodology for goals that may not be as easy to define. Follow my blog and I'll define those in more detail at a later date.
Regardless of what goal-setting method you use, it's critical that you WRITE YOUR GOALS DOWN! When you write them down you can then put them in a place where you'll see them all the time to remind yourself and can stay focused on reaching your goals, regardless of which area of life they fall into.
I: Instill Courage
Let's face it, the fear of the unknown stops most of us from taking action on things we'd really like to do in life.
What if she says 'no?'
What would happen if I asked for that promotion?
That job is in another state. How would I find new friends there?
I know my boss is not acting ethically. Would I get fired by calling them out?
What would happen if I started my own business? I don't even know where to start.
Unless there's a bear standing in front of us that would attack us if we moved closer to it (a real reason to be afraid), fear is really nothing more than our imaginations taking control of us. When we realize this, it frees us to act with courage and do the things that deep down we know will help us succeed.
There's a fantastic book by Dr. Susan Jeffers called "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway" that tackles this subject head on. I can't recommend this book strongly enough!
Fear can feel very real, and it can even manifest itself in our bodies physically. When we acknowledge that what we are feeling is fear, or something imagined, it allows us to instill courage and take the first, second, and infinite steps toward success in our lives. If we allow it to control us, we stagnate in life and fail to rise to our full potentials.
A: Act Boldly
Peer pressure is another major force in our lives. When we try to go against the grain of our friends, family, colleagues or society, it can result in some serious backlash. People don't like it when other people do things differently, and rather than encourage us they try to hold us back.
It's also very easy for us to make the easy choices in life rather than choosing to make a sacrifice or a difficult decision.
Both the ease of choice and peer pressure will try to limit your success just as much as fear. Sometimes they are even intertwined.
When Jerry Rice joined the San Francisco 49ers in 1985, the team realized that he acted differently than anyone else. During practice he would run his route, catch the ball, and always, ALWAYS run to the endzone. No one else ever did that. His thought process was that he would practice the same as he expected to play, and despite his teammates and coaches all trying to get him to do what everyone else had done previously, this habit helped him to establish a dynasty during his NFL career and helped him to be established into the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
"Today I will do what others won't do so tomorrow I can do what others can't" (Jerry Rice)
When we are willing to go against the grain by doing what others won't this will help to create mental toughness and habits that will contribute to your Hall of Fame rise to success.
S: Say Yes to new Opportunities
It's easy to say no. We learn it as children and we carry that habit with us throughout life.
When I joined the military one of the pieces of advise that I received was "don't volunteer for anything." This might have felt right from the person giving that advise but it didn't feel right to me. Almost in spite I decided to say yes to every request that came about, and I learned so much in the process. Yes, there were times I ended up with kitchen duty or cleaning bathrooms, but there were also times when I got to see and do things that others only dream about.
Have you noticed that it seems easier to say yes to things that don't help you at all in live, but say no to things that feel like work? Yeah, me too. It's hard to take on extra tasks. We are already drained from work or school, and doing more just seems like a burden. But that night out, dancing and drinking... I'm not too tired for that!
The next time you want to say no to something, let me encourage you to ask why you're saying no. This may very well be an opportunity knocking, and simply saying yes could literally change your life. You may end up working with someone who can offer you a new position that you love. You may end up discovering a new talent you never knew you had. You may even end up getting a promotion because someone else said "no" one too many times.
Summary
Build a Goals list.
Instill Courage.
Act Boldly.
Say Yes.
These steps, when practiced, will help you to develop a BIAS for success in every area of your life. Join me on the road to success, and let me know how I can help you along the way!
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